Have you ever had the idea that you said or did some things that you did not want? And vice versa, that they had refrained, even though it would have been better to say something or to act? Well, much of it happens in our affect. So, if we could control our affect actions, we are already a big step ahead in being more successful with the right actions at the right time.
Affect comes from the subconscious mind
Most of our actions and thinking are controlled by our subconscious mind. This part of our personality is responsible for our thoughts, our words and how we act. It helps and support us on everyday decisions like brushing our teeth, driving, and so on. But much more. The subconscious also has an impact on others, our areas of life such as our behaviors and responses, our beliefs, our performance, and the personal accomplishments associated with it.
What is an affect?
In the area of psychology, an affect is a special quality of feeling. Affects are always spontaneously occurring emotional states but also just as quickly go back as they came. Sudden anger that leads us to throw objects or spontaneous joy that makes us laugh are affects. In contrast, our fears, such as jealousy, are a state of mind. These have a more complex motive and are not spontaneous feelings. But if you want to deal with it in more detail, let me inform you that in psychology the concept of affect is still controversial. Rather, the term emotion is preferred. But we stay with the term affect and want to find out why sometimes it is wiser to slow down our affect actions.
The own affects slow down
Since affects are spontaneous reactions, we must first identify them as such. So if a violent emotion like anger or grief comes up in us, then it would be better, instead of living it out immediately and beating your fist on the table, to make yourself aware of where this emotion comes from. In principle, you should learn to feel yourself again. Listen to yourself.
Become a rock in the storm. Be an alpha leader
First of all, when you learn to deal with your affect actions, you gain a much higher quality of life for yourself. Because you can rely on yourself, you can already assess the situation in advance. You will know how you will react when unforeseen events occur.
And secondly, you are taken by your environment as much more solid and reputable. You are mutating automatically to a winner. Someone who always stays calm. When we meet such people in our lives, it impresses us, and we follow these personalities out of instinct. The instinct of stability and calm. So, if you learn to deal with your emotional emotions, you will automatically become the rock in the storm, that everyone longs for and that others like to join. And to do that, there are very simple exercises.
5 points to get the affect actions under control
Here are five points to practice on how to get your emotions under control:
Take 2 minutes a day to sit and listen to your breath
Take an item and look closely at it. This can be a very ordinary pen right in front of you. What is it made of? What color is it?
Just be quiet for a few minutes and hear the sound of your surroundings. Listen to it and recognize how loud it is when it is quiet.
Just go for a round. No matter where. Just get up and go for a few minutes without a goal.
Eat a snack and let the taste melt on your tongue. Be aware of the test and start to describe it.
These exercises come from the therapy of inner mindfulness. If you are more interested in this, I offer you to inform by yourself on the Internet about inner mindfulness. But I am also happy about a personal letter and/or welcome you in one of my seminars.
Have fun practicing to control your emotions.